I’ve been thinking on yesterday, and how I was told by another woman how perfect I make myself out to be because I practice and teach women submission and patriarchy. This woman that “needed to be honest with me” is also a head covered, Torah observant woman. (Eye roll.) Why don’t you actually get to know me and ask questions? (Please and thank you). Which is why I can’t help but think about how much our fellowships are being subtly controlled by the women there.
So how’s y’alls fellowships doing? I’ll tell you what, our fellowship here doesn’t talk about submission, nor do we EVER talk Biblical marriage/polygyny. We only talk about “non triggering” topics. That’s what the women call them. It’s super cute and catchy, huh? And, we don’t talk about such things even if they are in the Torah portions. Why do you think that is? Well, I ask, what husband wants to go home to a contentious wife?
I really just want to encourage you ladies to keep the good walk of faith, in faith. Gravitate to women who are actually PRACTICING submission, meaning they don’t just cluck like a bunch of loud hens. They walk the walk. It may have very little to do with poly, or a lot to do with poly. And, please be cautious, or better yet, stay out of the company of women that say phrases like, “WE (they speak for their husbands) aren’t called to that lifestyle. My husband would tell me.” Sure he would. “My husband said he can’t handle another woman in the house.” You may certainly be right about that one. Who in the heck wants 2 unsubmissive wives with mouths and attitudes? But, do you think he would say no to 2 or 3 fully submitted, Yah fearing women? “It’s in the Bible and some people have chosen that life style, but it isn’t for us.” Again, that speaks for her idea of family structure, not his.
Speaking FOR your husband and family is not ok. But, having genuine concerns and fear is something else. “It makes me feel…..”, or “This isn’t easy because…..” Those are valid statements, but feelings shouldn’t be the rule. Gravitate to a woman, even if not in a plural marriage, who is fully on board with submitting to her Heavenly Father and Head of the household…the one whom she calls master, whom she says “yes sir” to regularly. A sister who can be commanded to do something and not have to think twice about it. Follow that woman. Don’t have that woman in your fellowship? Then let it start with you.
Your covering should be able to speak authoritatively over you and his household. He should be able to correct you when needed, and tell you who he doesn’t think fits the bill in your friendships. If a “friend” isn’t helping you to grow, strengthening you, keeping you accountable and uplifting you spiritually, you need to move on. She is probably one of the reasons why your fellowship can’t be open in discussing all the triggering things men WANT to talk about. These women, even though not married to your husbands, can actually have control over THEM in the fellowship!! It’s always wise and good to be friendly, but by becoming close friends with women that resist submission, you may be enabling them to continue their rebellion. Thus your fellowship stays STUCK. Period. When will patriarchy and Biblical marriage ever be brought up and discussed? So if there is never any change, expect to find egg shells on your husband’s feet. Will you help him pick them off, or will he have to do it alone?